"The human brain does dumb things when it’s in love, even if it refuses to admit that love is what it’s feeling.”—Everything Is Awful.
Acknowledge what it was
It’s not uncommon for friends to fall for each other,. You might be tempted to avoid your feelings for your friend, but it's best to consider them, and figure out how you're feeling. Being honest about your emotions and being vulnerable won’t destroy you. In fact, it’ll only make you stronger. Keep in mind, if we ever fell in love with someone and that love was not reciprocated. OK. That’s what it is, but knowing that fact doesn’t destroy us. Oh, most certainly it hurts like all hell, but if it was love, of course the loss of it is going to hurt.
Some friendships aren’t ready for a conversation about feelings. It’s important to think about their personality. If they’re not someone who likes to talk about their feelings, maybe a long conversation about your feelings isn’t the way to tell them. Many times, the best path is by behavior instead of words. or example, inviting your best friend to be your date at a casual event, or to meet your parents for coffee when they are in town, will allow you to explore your friend's comfort level.
What if it did not go well?
You told your friend how you feel. They apologized and said they just didn’t feel the same way, though they valued your friendship. You agreed the friendship was important and assured them you wanted to stay friends. You feel sad and hurt, but you’ve experienced rejection before and know the feelings will pass in time. It’s normal to grieve, to feel hurt, sad, confused, or angry. But it’s also important not to direct those feelings at your friend. When your friend doesn’t return your romantic feelings, you both might struggle to deal with the situation. Yet friendships can recover from unrequited love if the situation is addressed with care and maturity. What happens next depends on both you and your friend.
Your friend might also need space. If they seem distant after you’ve told them how you feel, consider that they too may need to work through what happened. They may feel sadness or guilt and wonder how to act to prevent hurting you further. Give them some time. If you communicated daily in the past, after a few days you might send a casual message letting them know you’re there when they’re ready. Then wait for them to reach out.
“That’s why you don’t look for love. It comes to you just at the right time; the time you never thought it would have.” —MindBootstrap
Moving on doesn’t always look like a complete reversal of feelings or vilifying someone (though in very toxic situations, that may be totally justified). Perhaps being at peace comes from acknowledging that someone can still be a good-hearted person without also being the right person for you, right now. You may not stop loving them, but grow to love them in a different, honest way. Similarly, it doesn’t mean that you stop having feelings for them or stop being hurt by their actions, but you just step back and realize your expectation of them did not align with reality.
Give it time
We don't want to lose them — we likes having them in his life. If you tell your friend you like them and it doesn’t go well, you can still salvage the friendship. It will just take some time. “Time is the great healer,” If the friendship is worth having, it will survive, and so will you.
"Affection is when you see someone's strengths. Love is when you accept someone's flaws." —One Day
No comments:
Post a Comment